God Already Punished Jesus

In this chapter, Jeff writes that for a long time, he believed his actions were linked with his blessing/punishment from God.  What he came to realize, as the chapter title claims, was that God already punished Jesus completely and fully!  Any subsequent suffering can be used for good and growth, if we choose to allow it.

I was tired from emotional pain.

You ever had that? It’s weird how when emotional pain is

sharp enough, it almost feels like it physically hurts. For weeks

I couldn’t sleep—but the funny thing is, all I wanted to do

was sleep. Sleeping was the only time I didn’t feel depressed

or burdened. It was the only time the pain disappeared. It was

about lunchtime, and I had finished class and crashed on the

bed. That’s when everything flooded over me. It was in that

moment I had a scary but very concise thought. The easiest way

to take away this pain would be to put myself out of my misery.

Huh? Did I just think that? I thought only super-depressed

people had those thoughts. I snapped back into reality,

shocked I even had that thought. What was more shocking

was how attractive the thought was. It was a whisper that

promised something it couldn't give—peace (page 114).

We live in world where depression and suicidal thoughts are abundant.  And the pain is real! It hurts!

Jeff goes on to write that he had made idols out of people, relationships and things that weren't God!  And when those things would fail, he would feel the bottom pulled out from beneath him.  He learned: "I wanted God to give me an answer, but now I've found it is better when I just get him" (page 120). 

I've been here - sometimes I still slide back here!  I have made an idol out of many things in my life, not meaning to.  My experience has been that when I look to God, he makes ALL things good, just as he promised in Romans.  Even the most excruciatingly difficult times!

My dad left his earthly body four months ago.  This was an incredibly difficult time for me. I can't begin to put into words how difficult the last four months have been! I've never cried so many tears, felt such intense pain, and agonized over what had been, was, and would be, as a result of his passing.  At first, I didn't think I would ever feel better or have relief from this pain.  And there were definitely moments where I wished the pain would end. 

However, I chose, not too long after he died, that I was going to look for the good things God was doing in my grief and document them.  Even in the most pain I had ever experienced, I could see that God was already giving me hope and creating opportunities for massive growth!  I still have flutters of sadness, but God has worked many mighty miracles in my heart and mind ~ He made the most painful event I've experienced into something beautiful in countless ways. 

"The seasons when it’s tough, when it hurts, and when you hate it are bringing a season of sun and a season of life" (Page 119).  God isn't punishing you! You aren't getting what you deserve! "He owes us nothing, but he gives us everything" (Page 116).  And he will make ashes into beauty!  I KNOW this!

I appreciated Jeff's thoughts on how to best support people who are going through a difficult time. "If you can’t explain it or understand why, don’t try to. Be there, be gentle, be vulnerable, be involved, and let God’s grace do the talking. Because the truth is, no matter how ugly or how deep the scars, there is always hope" (page 126).

There is always hope In Jesus Christ who has promised to never leave us or forsake us! We have a GREAT God who loves us very much.  He works through our grief, suffering and difficulties to show us more love and more of Him!